My Vulva Gets Swollen and Sore After Repeatedly Use Of Vibrator
Woman uses a vibrator a few times per week during sex; the day after each episode she finds her vulva is swollen and sore. Is she doing serious harm to her vulva? Can she continue using a vibrator without soreness and future issues?
Case #: 604
Concern：
I have been using a vibrator a few times a week (for around 30 minutes each time) during sex with my boyfriend...I normally use it on the surface of my vulva...and after each time I use it, my vulva gets swollen and it also gets sore, usually the soreness lasts a day and sometimes more...I'm paranoid that if I continue to use it I might be doing harm to my vulva...is it possible for me to develop vulval damage from using a vibrator that is powerful or from using a vibrator for too long a period of time...and if so, what kind of problems? Moreover, are any of these problems so serious that they are hard to treat or even irreversible? I would like to continue using a vibrator without it giving me the soreness that it does and without it potentially giving me any vulva problems in the future...here is some information about me that may or may not help, I don't take birth control pills.
Discussion：
Unfortunately, I don’t think there is an alternative to your story of vibrator usage and soreness. I can’t imagine using a vibrator for 30 minutes at a time; fixating such stimulation on one specific area for so long seems like a recipe for chafing and soreness the next day.
Yes, using a continuously using a vibrator has myriad long-term issues, such as numbness in the clitoris, vagina, and g-spot; possible issues with muscle control around the bladder and rectum; and increased incidence of UTIs (Urinary Tract Infections). Here is a question that I think is the crux of the issue: do you need to use the vibrator for the full 30 minutes to be able to orgasm? If so, I think we need to consider different methods to get you off without relying solely on the vibrator.
Craving the Feeling
Is there any other way for you to achieve orgasm during sex than by simultaneously using a vibrator? It could be that you need the intense clitoral stimulation, and you’re not alone. Many women, previously classed as “non-orgasmic”, have found that they can achieve orgasm through the use of a vibrator, as it provides the strong clitoral sensations that they need.
However, if you can get off in other ways, it would be best to use those as much as possible, and to rely on the vibrator only when absolutely necessary.
The reason is that continued vibrator use can lead to desensitization of the entire genital area, which will make it that much harder to orgasm, requiring even stronger stimulation to feel anything. It’s better try to find pleasure in other ways than simply vibration, if at all possible.
A Holistic Experience
You mentioned that you use the vibrator for 30 minutes at a time; I wonder if you’re using it during foreplay, or during the sex act itself. If you are using it for foreplay, I urge you to consider a different method of arousal. Watching or reading something erotic together, combined with specific and targeted manual or oral titillation is a more holistic way to approach intercourse than jumping in cold, as it were, and relying on the vibrator to do the work.
I’ve mentioned before that it takes woman 20 minutes of thinking about sex to mentally prepare for arousal; I consider this a very telling statistic. How many couples actually take the 20 minutes to allow the female to become sufficiently turned on to begin exhibiting arousal symptoms? I think that by taking a slower approach to sex, with more emphasis put onto full body sensation, you could more easily achieve orgasm. Are you familiar with Tantric sex?
It teaches the importance of making sex a very partnered experience, where each lover seeks to give the other pleasure, rather than racing towards the finish line. It might help take the pressure off of you (and your vulva) to focus on the entire sex experience, rather than orgasm, orgasm, orgasm; resulting in a more easily achieved orgasm without the heavy stimulation.
Rev Your Engines
I also think you could benefit from a natural solution (see: Natural Clitoral Revitalization) for a more sensitive genital region. By increasing the receptiveness of your vulva and clitoris, you will have a much better sexual experience overall.
Plus, the increased blood flow is good for the general health of your sexual organs, by removing scar tissue, opening blood vessels for better sexual response, and strengthening and toning the muscles encircling your vagina and bladder.
I hope you decide to expand your sexual horizons and stop relying on your vibrator; I think it will serve you much better in the long run!